Big Sisters, Big Brothers, and the Big News

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Big Sisters, Big Brothers, and the Big News
Big Sister, Big Brothers, and the Big News: Sibling Rivalry or Sibling Revelry?
Becoming a big brother or sister is big news. Good news or bad news, it's news none the less. Most of us believe that our children will be the exception to the rivalry situation. And for a small number of us, it's true. For most families, there will be see some rivalry, but it is something which can be limited if approached with care.

First time big brothers and sisters reactions can run the gamut from complete excitement to complete rejection. Some of that is based on preparation, so take the time to prepare your child carefully.

If your child is becoming a bigger sibling (already achieved big brother or sister status and this baby is another new addition in life), the transition may different this time around than last. She knows what to expect. That can make it easier or harder depending on your child.

Do you have step-children? Or do you have children from a previous relationship? Sometimes, the approach needs to be extra sensitive for these soon-to-be big brothers and sisters.

Whether the older siblings in this little miracle's life are full or half siblings, time and attention must be paid to meeting their pre-arrival needs so that everyone's needs are met once baby is on the scene. How do you do that?

The Road to Sibling Rivalry Is Paved With...
Lack of information
Not enough involvement in getting ready for baby
Unanswered Questions
Fear
Misunderstanding

The Road to Sibling Revelry Is Paved With...
Education
Involvement in getting ready for baby
Opportunities for questions
Respect
An environment where children can voice their fears
Affection
And affirmation of how very important they are to you and your partner

We're Having a Baby: Getting The Kids Involved

1. Presentation sets the tone for acceptance. From the first announcement (see below about when to announce), present the baby as the family's baby, rather than Mommy's baby, or Mommy and Daddy's baby. Feeling like a part of the team, which they are after all, makes children feel empowered. A child who is heard saying things like "My baby is going to be born in..." or "When my baby comes she'll sleep a lot..." will probably have an easier transition than one who views baby as Mom's or Dad's. It's everyone's baby, because you're a family.