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Childbirth takes a lot out of your body. If you gave birth vaginally, your delicate vaginal tissues may be bruised and torn, and they need time to heal. Because sexual intercourse, tampon use, douching, or anything placed in the vagina can cause infection, most doctors recommend you wait until after your first postnatal check-up, which is often six weeks after delivery. This allows your cervix time to close and for any postpartum bleeding to stop. Any tears or lacerations that occurred during the labor and delivery process will also have time to heal by this six week marker.
Keep in mind that even if your doctor gives you the 'OK' to have sex, it doesn't mean that you'll actually have the energy or desire for it. The reasons include:
- Fatigue: Having a new baby in the house can be very exhausting. You will only be able to sleep when your baby sleeps. FYI, most babies do not sleep through the night in those early months.
- Fear of Pain:Being afraid of physical pain can kill your sex life. After childbirth, some women do experience vaginal pain and discomfort when they have sex. This may be due to the loss of the estrogen levels in your body, which can make your vaginal tissues raw and can leave your vagina dry. Breastfeeding can also lower your estrogen levels. Luckily, this should be short lived. For most new moms, their pain goes away by the child's first birthday.
- Stress: Taking care of your new baby can add a lot of stress and anxiety in your life. Stress can leave you with little desire for sex.
- Body Image Issues: You may not feel attractive in the weeks, or even months, after you have your baby.
Every woman has a different timeline for when she is ready to jump back into the sac. Some want to have sex within a few weeks after delivery, while others need a couple of months and even longer. Even if you have a desire to have sex, it's important to wait until the healing process is complete.
Not ready to resume your normal sex life? There are other ways you can be intimate with your partner. Fondling and other forms of sex, including oral sex and masturbation, may be right for you.
When you are ready to start having sex again, don't rush it. Take your time and talk to your partner about what feels good and what doesn't. Use a lubricant, as your vaginal may still be less moist than before pregnancy. Try different positions that are comfortable for you.
You should not have sex if you experience any fever, unpleasant smelling vaginal discharge, or bleeding.
If you want to avoid pregnancy, it's important to use some form of contraception. Breastfeeding alone should not be your own choice, as it only works as a natural contraceptive under strict circumstances.
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